Ever have the need to write, but have nothing to say? Nothing wise, nothing witty, nothing wonderful makes for a whiny post.
Musicman is doing well but it is slow going. He is able to do more and more for himself everyday, but I'm firmly in nurse mode at the moment. Managing meds and doctor appointments, feeding and clothing and blah blah blah. Yep, that's what it feels like, that's what I feel like, blah blah blah.
Musicman is very frustrated right now, he does not do weak well. The more he sees me moving and doing the worse it gets. I try to remember when he has an outburst that not only is he dealing with a lot of pain, but it must be very emasculating for him. He is not the type of guy to sit around doing nothing while I run around like a headless chicken. But things have to be that way right now.
We are both feeling the frustration of not being able to be together. It will be 2 weeks tomorrow and that's just way too long for either of us. Of course, we could try, but me moving around too much in the bed causes him pain, so it's not really practical right now. His incisions are not healed yet and between the cath and the surgery he is a giant bruise from his collar bone to his heel, not really play inducing.
I keep telling myself this too will pass and try to remember how grateful I am that we found this in time and fixed it. Sometimes that just isn't enough, I need my big strong husband back, and he needs to be back.
I'm off to clean and do some laundry and fantasize about the day he is well again.
Oh yes, I know what it's like to really want to write and not have anything I think others would want to read. I usually write anyway, I'm not forcing other to read. After a while, as we all get to know one another, I realize that we are usually interested in what's going on in our friends lives. I would rather hear that you and Musicman are swinging from the chandelier to the beat of a paddle, but until then I still want to hear how thing are in real life.
ReplyDeleteAt the moment we are very healthy and there are still long stretches where I have nothing 'on topic' to write about.
I know that this healing process must suck for you both but, as long as you are heading in the right direction... Maybe Musicman could keep a list of all the things he's dying to spank you for when the time comes!!
Hugs,
PK
Yeah sometimes I feel like I don't really have anything very much to say, but sometimes we just plain old write just for ourselves don't we.
ReplyDeleteI agree with PK, that as we get to know each other better through blogger, that it's good to read of the day to day stuff too that we all go through.
I'm glad your musicman is recovering :) Hang in there faerie, you're doing what you need to do right now.
Dee x
I agree with the above - I don't usually have anything much to say either, but I force myself and if others read, great. If not, that's okay too. In person when there's nothing to say the person is still there so the silence doesn't seem to metter. But here in blogland, if you don't write we can't keep up with our "friends" real life. That is how we support one another.
ReplyDeleteGlad Musicman is doing well. You are a better nurse than I. When hubbie had his knees replaced I was awful. My hubbie will attest to that. Neither one of us are good patients or exhibit a lot of patience.
Hang in there. You're closer to healing than you were just three weeks ago. Time goes quickly. Soon the wishing will be "OMG, not again." LOL
Make it a Great Day
Sunny Girl
I'm glad Musicman is getting better bit by bit. I'm sure you're both impatient for him to be back to himself again, but just think of how sweet it will be when he is. (((hugs))) Keep writing Faerie, if it helps you work through things. I enjoy reading, on topic or not. ;)
ReplyDeleteGrace, neither of us are patient people, if I didn't have this outlet to write I'd be very tempted to hurt someone, lol.
ReplyDeleteSunnygirl, I can do the nurse stuff with my eyes closed it's so automatic for me. I have to say, you are right, we are closer than we were to him feeling better, I just specialize in inpatient.
Dee, thanks for being a cheerleader for me. The experience of blogging has been better than any therapy and I hope to continue for the foreseeable future.
PK, swinging from a chandelier to the beat of a paddle not only sounds like a lot of fun, but would make for a more interesting post. Hopefully soon there will be posts like that, in the mean time it's nice to have the support of friends. I honestly don't know at this point how I would have gotten through without it.