Sunday, October 30, 2011

What's a spanko?

Well, as I soon discovered I am.  Yeah, I like them. Alot.
So I did what people these days do. I cruised around the internet looking for info.  Not something I had done very much of. I spent all day on computers at work, the last thing I wanted to do was get on one at home.  Who has the time anyway? 
But I'm not working right now I have plenty of time and I have the interest, so cruise I did.

I have to say I was stunned with what I found, I knew what blogs were, sorta. I had never really seen one before, I was a blog virgin. LOL.

The most glaringly obvious thing to me was that here was a community of people, mostly women it seemed, who SUPPORTED one another. They cared about each other, they related in a positive way. The vast majority of people in my career field are women.  My experience has been that these women have a knife permanently installed in their hands poised at the back of anyone brave enough or stupid enough to turn it on them. It was often a lonely place for me to be. I've never felt the need to criticize and tear someone down to make myself feel better and don't understand people who do.

The next thing that really caught my attention was these women loved their husbands/partners and didn't apologize for that.  And, OMG, they liked sex too. Men bashing is a very popular past time in my real world and sex is just something to avoid.  So sad and so not me.  I've never really felt like I fit in, but that never bothered me.  Until I did feel like I fit in somewhere.  I was hooked.

Then came all these letters DD, D/s, M/s, BDSM.  I had heard about most of them, except DD. That was a new one for me. I was absolutely fascinated and overwhelmed.  So much to read, so much to learn, so much to process.  The one thing I did know was I wanted this, I just had to figure out what "this" was.  Therein lies the glitch in my system.  I way over think everything.  If you could kill someone with just the sheer volume of thoughts I would be the best weapon ever.  Now the upside of this is I usually do my best thinking while I'm cleaning. My home fairly sparkles right now, all my closests and drawers are organized, not a thing out of place. So you might guess I have it all figured out, NOT.   Have any closets you need cleaned? I'll be right over, ignore that odd burning smell, it's just me thinking.