Sunday, January 22, 2012

Spankings & Blowjobs & Bruises....Oh My!!!

It's the end of a wonderfully lazy weekend and I'm sitting here on a nice warm backside waiting for American Idol to come on. Steven Tyler cracks me up. We spent the afternoon watching football, my favorite way to pass a winter Sunday afternoon.

Prior to the football games coming on we had a window of opportunity when our son went out with friends.
Now I freely admit, I don't get spanked for any kind of disciplinary reasons. Too much of an ick factor for me. Anything that might smack of a parent/child relationship is a huge NO for me. And for me, that is what it would feel like if Musicman were to discipline me.

We have discussed it and that is not something he is interested in either. Besides the fact that neither of us wants that, it is also not something we need in our relationship. The day to day details of our life and the way we interact with each other is something we worked out a long time ago. Yeah, all my spankings are good girl spankings and they are usually a prelude to, or part of other activities.

It has been interesting this last week as Musicman has started to feel better and get some of his strength back. I have started to realize how much of his nature he suppressed in order to protect me. When I say protect, I mean emotionally. I never really thought about how much he did that until things changed, and I know he is still being cautious with me. I am seeing subtle, yet powerful changes.

There was a time at the beginning of our relationship that I didn't want him to touch me when I was giving him a blowjob. It's not something he ever made me do. I like doing it, he just couldn't really touch me, especially my head, or it might trigger bad memories and a spazz attack on my part. The way I did it had to be on my terms, or I couldn't do it. That has slowly changed over the years. Now that I think about it, it seems comparable to someone breaking a wild horse. He's a very patient man when it comes to dealing with me.

Yet, it never crossed a line that made me feel like I wasn't in control. But now, well, now I want to feel his control, and boy howdy am I. Not only is it not triggering any kind of bad memories, yay, but I am finding it incredibly hot. The man had me begging for things that previously he would never have even asked of me. And I loved every single second of it.

In a way it makes me sad. I feel like because I was damaged it held him back. He doesn't feel that way. And he continues to surprise and delight me in the things he is doing. He also makes me laugh every time he reminds me that I promised him a more fun way to rehab then walking on a treadmill. I like his ideas of fun, lol. I did warn him that tomorrow when we go see Doc for a checkup and he asks about rehab I'm gonna bust up laughing. I think I will just keep my mouth shut and let Musicman explain, heeheehee.

On and end note, Musicman noticed today that I had a small bruise from some playtime on Friday. I'll spare you the details, but it did involve the hairbrush. I like the hairbrush and had no idea I had a bruise. When he brought it to my attention my first thought was, I hope he doesn't feel bad about it. I do bruise easily, it was a    
small bruise, and I'm amply padded back there, so I never would have known had he not told me.  He handled it appropriately, and yes he kissed my booboo. And then he spanked me again. I love my guy.

18 comments:

  1. It's nice to know Musicman is well on his way to being Himself. :)

    it's wonderful too that you've both worked out what works for you.

    I'm reading several blog posts today all concerning LOVE within a D/s relationship and how it CAN be possible. there's hope for me yet.

    Thank you for sharing Faerie. your post made me smile.

    Fondly. Sky

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    1. Sky, I'm glad I could make you smile and yes there is hope. There is always hope, just don't give up.

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  2. LOL! He kissed it better and then spanked you again. Yup, you two are doing just fine! I'm really glad to hear it faerie.

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    1. This is one of those times "fine" really means fine, lol.

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  3. Love this. I'm so happy to see how much musicman has improved. And he is such a gentleman! I love that he kisses your booboo before spanking again. I'd love to watch you giggle as Musicman and the doctor discuss rehab. Obviously when it comes to rehab you are doing something right.

    Hugs,
    PK

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    1. I did spend half my career working in rehab. He spent a lot of time "checking" to see if my bruise was gone yesterday, lol.

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  4. I'm so happy the two of you are enjoying yourselves.

    If it's akin to breaking a wild horse, as you mention, then I'm sure what he feels is not that he's been held back, but an enormous sense of pride and accomplishment.

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    1. Conina, I never thought of it that way, thanks.

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  5. Hahahahaaaaa, I love it! It sounds like you guys are finding each other again, and that's wonderful! :)

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    1. HeeHeeHee, we are having a wonderful time.

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  6. glad to hear that musicman is well on his way to recovery :) yeaaaaa :)
    sounds like you guys are i a great place and its so good to read :)
    happy for you both
    love and hugs kiwi xxx

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    1. Thanks Kiwi, yep we are in a great place, I wish it could stay this way forever, alas reality will soon knock.

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  7. i'm so happy for you both!!! It sounds like things are getting back to normal, and maybe better in some ways. That's so wonderful.

    As for having been "damaged" ~ i gotta say my two cents worth ~ not damaged. We all come to relationships with injuries, some have already healed, some haven't. Sometimes, that healing process is part of what builds the relationship.

    i have a feeling the Musicman treasured the time it took to lead you where he wanted you to be.

    aisha

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    1. aisha, you and Conina have both given me a new perspective on things, because as I told her I never considered it that way. Thank you.

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  8. I'm smiling with you and for you :))

    Dee x

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  9. I am so happy for you and Musicman sweetie. That is wonderful! I hope you both have a lot more fun, exciting times ahead of you. Hugs!

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    1. Thank you, things are definitely looking up:)

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