Spankings & Blowjobs & Bruises....Oh My!!!

It's the end of a wonderfully lazy weekend and I'm sitting here on a nice warm backside waiting for American Idol to come on. Steven Tyler cracks me up. We spent the afternoon watching football, my favorite way to pass a winter Sunday afternoon.

Prior to the football games coming on we had a window of opportunity when our son went out with friends.
Now I freely admit, I don't get spanked for any kind of disciplinary reasons. Too much of an ick factor for me. Anything that might smack of a parent/child relationship is a huge NO for me. And for me, that is what it would feel like if Musicman were to discipline me.

We have discussed it and that is not something he is interested in either. Besides the fact that neither of us wants that, it is also not something we need in our relationship. The day to day details of our life and the way we interact with each other is something we worked out a long time ago. Yeah, all my spankings are good girl spankings and they are usually a prelude to, or part of other activities.

It has been interesting this last week as Musicman has started to feel better and get some of his strength back. I have started to realize how much of his nature he suppressed in order to protect me. When I say protect, I mean emotionally. I never really thought about how much he did that until things changed, and I know he is still being cautious with me. I am seeing subtle, yet powerful changes.

There was a time at the beginning of our relationship that I didn't want him to touch me when I was giving him a blowjob. It's not something he ever made me do. I like doing it, he just couldn't really touch me, especially my head, or it might trigger bad memories and a spazz attack on my part. The way I did it had to be on my terms, or I couldn't do it. That has slowly changed over the years. Now that I think about it, it seems comparable to someone breaking a wild horse. He's a very patient man when it comes to dealing with me.

Yet, it never crossed a line that made me feel like I wasn't in control. But now, well, now I want to feel his control, and boy howdy am I. Not only is it not triggering any kind of bad memories, yay, but I am finding it incredibly hot. The man had me begging for things that previously he would never have even asked of me. And I loved every single second of it.

In a way it makes me sad. I feel like because I was damaged it held him back. He doesn't feel that way. And he continues to surprise and delight me in the things he is doing. He also makes me laugh every time he reminds me that I promised him a more fun way to rehab then walking on a treadmill. I like his ideas of fun, lol. I did warn him that tomorrow when we go see Doc for a checkup and he asks about rehab I'm gonna bust up laughing. I think I will just keep my mouth shut and let Musicman explain, heeheehee.

On and end note, Musicman noticed today that I had a small bruise from some playtime on Friday. I'll spare you the details, but it did involve the hairbrush. I like the hairbrush and had no idea I had a bruise. When he brought it to my attention my first thought was, I hope he doesn't feel bad about it. I do bruise easily, it was a    
small bruise, and I'm amply padded back there, so I never would have known had he not told me.  He handled it appropriately, and yes he kissed my booboo. And then he spanked me again. I love my guy.