Saturday, November 17, 2012

Evolution of a Blowjob

As many of you may already know, I'm a very proud member of the Cock Worshipping Sub Club, and have the plaque to prove it. I've recently wrapped up a project with Spanky in which he interviewed me about my thoughts on blowjobs. He interviewed both myself and Fondles. I found Fondles interview quite interesting and if you haven't read it you should give it a look see. I believe my interview will be posted next week, I hope ya'll will check it out. I'd love to here what you have to say about it.

One of the reasons I found Fondles interview so interesting, is because I've always wondered what a "normal girl's" experience with blowjobs was like. My experience with them was definitely not normal. Blowjobs were a mainstay of my abuse which started when I was quite young. As near as I can figure I've been giving blowjobs for about 45 years now. I'm only 48.

The interview however, does not speak about the abuse. That isn't what I wanted to talk about, and I highly doubt it's what Spanky or anyone else wants to hear. Once the abuse stopped I could have easily chosen to never give a blowjob again, after all, many women never do. That isn't what I chose to do though. I chose, in my own way, to turn a negative into a positive. I chose to take my power back and learn to love giving blowjobs. Much of what you will read in the interview(should you choose to read it) is about how I did that.

Much of what you read in the interview are things no one but Musicman knows about me. And, I want to be very clear that Musicman does know these things about me. He knows as much about my past as he wanted to know, or I needed to tell. It never concerned him much though. He has always been way more focused on my future instead of my past. In fact, the only interest he has ever had in my past was what he needed to know to protect me. He's done exactly that too.

I found the interview process to be quite a unique experience. I've never really had the chance to tell that particular part of my story in total before. As I knew it would, it took me on trip down memory lane. Sometimes that can be painful for me, but this time it wasn't. It really helped me realize how far I've come from the wounded young girl I used to be, to the woman I am now. I owe a huge debt of gratitude to Spanky for that. Thanks Spanky!!!!

As I said earlier, I believe the interview will be posted next week. I hope ya'll will take the time to stop by at Spanky's place and give it a read. You might find some of the things I have to say shocking, or you might identify with some of it, or both. No matter what your reaction, I hope you'll see it for what is, a story of triumph. I think it is anyway.




19 comments:

  1. Thanks for letting me interview you, Faerie! I hope to have the first part up on Monday. There is enough to break it up into at least 3 parts, I think.

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    1. Thank you, this was a truly interesting experience for me. I would love to see this as a series. That is of course, if you were interested in continuing and other women were ineterested in doing it.

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    2. I would definitely be interested in continuing, if anyone was interested.

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  2. I will definitely stop by to read the interview. Our past leads us to the present and future and in many cases defines who we are and how we handle what life throws at us. You triumphed and that's a success story.

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    1. I've always fought against how life tried to define me, I'm determined to define myself. I hope you'll see that when you read the interview.

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  3. faerie and Spanky, I can't wait to read it! I loved reading fondles. I wonder how many of us think that our experience wasn't "normal." What exactly is "normal?" I think the fact that you chose not to be a victim that was defeated speaks volumes. You are an amazing woman!

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    1. I've often wondered, "who gets to define normal?" This one time, I know, for a fact, my experience wasn't normal. It's something I used to wish was different, but I've since learned to accept. I've also learned acceptance can be a good thing.

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    2. Of course, you are right. I hope I didn't offend you - abuse is NEVER normal. But I was just thinking that there are so many of us who have that thought. My experience, for whatever reason, isn't "normal". There are also sooooo many of us with bad experiences be them physical or sexual or emotional - at some point in time ... I am sorry if I offended you in ANY way!

      Anyway...I think you you chose the absolutely right word...acceptance. It happened. You don't have to forget or even forgive ... but in order to move in a healthy direction you also have to accept it as having been.

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    3. No my friend, you didn't offend me. I almost didn't use the word normal, because I felt it was a bit controversial. But, I struggled for many years feeling as if I would never be "normal" because of my experiences growing up. It wasn't until I realized I was the one who got to define normal that acceptance started to come.

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  4. SirQsmlb said exactly what I was thinking. You are remarkable that you did not allow the abuse to define you. I'm looking forward to reading the interview.

    Kiki

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    1. I rarely let anyone other than myself define me. That's something I needed to learn very early on to survive. Maybe, just maybe, someone can be helped or benefit from my experiences, from my sharing story. That's a positive I can work with.

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  5. I'm looking forward to reading that interview. Good on you for not letting your past take over your future.

    Hugs, Julia

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    1. Thank you Julia. I can't really explain why, but not fighting, not surviving, was never an option for me. The struggle has paid off immeasurably for me. There is a happy ending, and that is what I hope to share.

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  6. I agree who gets to define normal. I believe we are all a mixture of many things, feelings, experiences and how we choose to live gives us power. I love that you took ownership of your sensuality and sexuality, making it beautiful and positive.
    This is why judging is so destructive because we do not ever know what our fellow brothers and sisters have overcome.

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    1. You are so right Minelle, now if we could just get the rest of the world on board, lol :)

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  7. I am looking forward to the interview. I am glad that you overcame the abuse you suffered at a very young age.

    Hug,
    joey

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    1. Thanks joeyred, I hope you find it interesting :)

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  8. Great to hear it is a story of triumph.

    FD

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  9. I'm sorry to hear that your past was not so pleasant, but it is very inspiring that you took something so negative and turned it into a positive one. I have a slightly similar background and I'm always happy to see when others can take the bad things in life and make good situations out of it. Thank you for sharing this with us, your readers.

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