Just Another Friday Night

A wonderful spanking with the magic paddle followed the reconnection activities I wrote about in my last post, but I didn't share the details. Selfish of me, I know. It was lovely but not my focus at the moment. Since I'm a sharing kinda girl, I'll share my most recent spanking.

The heat has returned here, with temps in the high 80's, so we decided to relax and watch some TV in the airconditioning. We rarely turn on the airconditioning throughout our home cause I have very sensitive sinuses and it gives me terrible headaches. We do however, usually have the air going in the bedroom so we can sleep comfortably.

Musicman was sitting on the lounge and I was reclining on the bed, just relaxing and talking about our day. I got up to use the bathroom which is directly outside our bedroom. While I was in there I started hearing slapping noises coming from the bedroom. Musicman had picked up the leather bitch paddle and was slapping his thigh with it, loudly.

The sound alone was enough to get my blood running. I have to walk past where he was sitting to get back to the bed, I didn't make it. He grabbed me and pulled me in to stand between his legs, then he twirled me around and told me to sit. So, I sat. That's what all obedient subs would do right?

In the blink of an eye he had the top of my dress pulled down and that lovely paddle back in his hand. Swat, swat, swat, swat, first one breast then the other. I grabbed onto his legs, which were positioned one on either side of my legs and let my head fall back against his shoulder. Swat, swat, swat, swat, mmmmm....have I mentioned I'm really starting to love that paddle?

I was already wet when he pulled my dress up and spread my legs wide. Swat, swat, swat, swat to the lady parts. I closed my eyes and snuggled in closer to his neck,  revelling in the feel of the leather as he moved back and forth between my breasts and my pussy. We've yet to use a blindfold, but it really isn't necessary as I usually always close my eyes when he is spanking me. I love the anticipation of the next blow and not knowing where it will connect just adds to the excitement.

I have no idea how long this went on as I was a melting further and further into a giant puddle with each blow. With my breasts and pussy sufficiently warmed up he stopped and stood me up. He propelled me forward a couple steps and bent me over the side of the bed. We have a water bed, so kneeling bent over the edge is not comfortable. I was standing, bent over, hanging on to the wood frame of the bed.

He flipped up the back of my dress and started in again with the paddle. He is getting used to the force needed with the new paddle and let me tell you, he got it just right last night. It didn't take long for my butt to become as warm as the other parts that had previously met with the paddle. But he wasn't done yet, he told me to spread my legs, he wanted to see my pussy. So, I did. That's what all obedient subs would do, right?

Swat, swat, swat to my butt, swat, swat, swat to my pussy. Oh yeah, I'm really lovin' that leather paddle. He continued on in this manner until he had worked me into quite the frenzy. When he stopped, I turned around and sunk to the floor. I wanted him. I wanted him in my mouth, now. I would have kneeled as that position is ideal for what I wanted, but I have a bum knee and don't kneel easily. I was not thinking clearly enough to retrieve my kneeling pillow, so I just sat down.

I'm a tall lady, with just a bit of a stretch I can easily reach my goal, his lovely cock. There's something about spanking followed by a blowjob that I find very comforting and fulfilling. Since Musicman always says he just wants me to be happy  he was nice enough to oblige my particular want in that moment.

I've noticed since we have started TTWD that I have become more aggressive about initiating intimate encounters. He may have initiated round one, but, a bit later, it was all me when we went for round two.

It was a lovely way to start a 3 day weekend. Now, I'm off to the grocery store to get stocked up for the weekend.  Musicman is at work and should be home around lunch, it would be nice if I had something to feed him when he gets here.

If I Were Inclined

Technology is a wonderful thing, when it works. My computer hasn't been working well and it's been a bit frustrating. It started out just being lazy last week, not loading pages and not letting me read or comment on blogs the way I would like. It progressed to not letting me access emails.  Then it just decided to go crazy, send me all kinds of error messages and then crash. Musicman has worked on it several times over the weekend to bring it back to life for me.

I realized when it wasn't working, that for me, blogging is like sex. The more I do it, the more inclined I am to do it. I haven't had much time or resources to blog, and now I don't feel too inclined to write. I'm happy to say the same can't be said of sex in this case.

If I were inclined to write, I could talk about our playtime Friday night and the newish leather paddle we got. Because it's new he is still feeling it out some. Unfortunately, I was pretty stressed about something Friday night, the pain was what I needed, but I needed more then what he gave me then. I was having a hard time relaxing into the pain, chasing the bliss instead of letting it roll in and envelope me. It was nice, but it left me a bit edgy and that isn't always such a good thing.

If I were inclined to write, I could tell you how he threatened to spank me Saturday. The edginess hadn't really gone away, though it hadn't escalated either. It had been a busy morning with Musicman working and me completing a full list of domestic activities. We were getting ready to go out for the evening, apparently my edginess was starting to get on his nerves some. He asked me if he needed to take me over his knee and spank me. Well...

If I were inclined to write, I could tell you how odd it was to have other men compliment him on the way I looked. It made me wonder if I give off sub vibes, or is it him giving off Dom vibes? Or maybe, it's just a guy thing and means nothing, lol. Or I could write about how when asked by a woman about the "thing" around my neck I said it was a necklace. Yet, when asked by a man about the "thing" around my neck I said it was a collar. Yes, they both referred to it as a "thing", that in itself seemed odd.

If I were inclined to write, I could tell you how Musicman got a bit tipsy, so I totally took advantage of him. I teased him with both words and mouth until he he couldn't take it anymore. I didn't stop until he grabbed me by my hair and pushed me face first into the bed and took me hard and fast and deep. Just like I wanted. Too bad he doesn't remember it, I was spectacular, lol.

If I were  inclined to write, I could tell you how we spent some time yesterday afternoon playing in the sun. How he wound me all up, then sent me inside to our room. How he followed closely and stripped me easily. How he ordered me to bend over as he retrieved the paddle. I'm really starting to appreciate uninterrupted time on Sunday afternoons.

If I were inclined to write, I could tell you some more about our new leather paddle and how we played with it again Sunday night. The sting of leather on the lady parts, or the breasts or the thighs. Dragged so softly and slowly across my face and down my neck, deliciously snaking it's way between my breasts before lifting to deliver the next sting.

Even if I were inclined to write, I've had a busy day of laundry and housework. I don't spend much time on it on the weekends, preferring to spend the time with Musicman instead. Just the trail of discarded clothes and toys that need picked up and dealt with can be daunting. Hopefully, when I'm done I will have some time to read some blogs and catch up with all my friends.

It felt like imposed isolation, not being able to connect with the world. I hadn't realized how much I have come to depend on technology, until it wasn't working. Maybe the inclination to write will come back soon too.

Am I the BJ Lady?

Just got home from work and my feet are killing me. I might be tempted to give up spanking forever for a nice foot rub. Okay, not forever, but a foot rub would be heavenly right about now. Of course a nice spanking would make me forget how much my feet hurt, so I guess maybe I won't give them up. As if I was ever really considering that!

I was looking at the Google terms used to find my blog. There has been a huge influx of people looking for me by name. That's very flattering. I never imagined anyone would really be interested in the drivel that spills so copiously from my head, but apparently people do.  Thanks people.

The most common term used to find me has been blow jobs. Now someone is Googling, "loves to give blow jobs" blogspot. I never realized how may ways to look up blow jobs on the internet there were. I never bothered to look since I already love them so much. I get a lot of people searching for blowjob bruises too. Why would someone want to cause bruises by giving a blow job? Just wondering!  Hmmm...maybe I should change the name of my blog. Just kidding, I wouldn't change the name of my blog now.  Though I could call it The Blow Job Lady.

I also pretty regularly get people Googling "sex tease." I could take this offensively, I'm not a tease. Well, I might be a tease. Teasing is fun, I freely admit that. I also admit I like to tease my hubby. Why else would I walk around the house in tiny little Tinkerbell shorts? Or, short skirts and no undies? There is a reason why Musicman likes to follow me up the stairs instead of leading the way, the view is better.

Since I never say no to any advances or overtures though, I don't think I qualify as a tease.  Hopefully they are looking to find out how to be a tease. Or, maybe they are trying to figure out how to spot a tease. I don't really know. Maybe I should do a post on being prepared to follow through if you are going to tease. That would be the responsible thing to do I guess. No one finds me by Googling  "responsible" though so I am not gonna worry too much about it.

Another very common term that brings people to my blog is "selfish submission" or any combination of those two words. I did do a post very early on where I said I felt my submission was selfish. This is not a reflection on anyone else or what submission looks like to them. Nope, it's all about me. This is my blog after all. It's probably the most selfish thing I have ever done for myself too.

Taking the time everyday or every other day out of my schedule to write does seem selfish. But, I'm not a very selfish person in general, so I think I can slide by on this one thing. The benefits to me and to our relationship far outweigh any selfishness on my part anyway. I have learned so much about myself and dealt with some tough issues that have haunted me for years by writing here. I am in a really good place after going through a couple really bad years. That can't be selfish.

Sharing totally unrelated fairy pics with every post might be selfish. Too bad, I like fairies and I'm gonna share the pics, cause I can. What would you expect from a blogger named faerie, who entitled her blog, faerie learns to fly?

Selfish or not, tease or not, blowjob lover or not. I love blogging. I love my readers and all the wonderfully insightful and delightful comments they leave. I love the friends and the connections I've made with like minded people.

I won't be changing the name of the blog, I won't be giving up spanking anytime soon. I may have to work a little harder to find the time and an appropriate topic to write about, but, I won't be giving up my selfish habit of blogging anytime soon.


I'm no angel after all!!!!

Post Apocalypse

How do I explain something I don't understand myself?

Things have been going great, especially since I am so bad at knowing what it is I want and need. I know what I don't want, does that help? Maybe a little. 

So yesterday I woke up to my alarm going off and was in the grips of a nightmare. I have a terrible history of repetitive nightmares. They have occurred my whole life and sparked my interest in dream interpretation. Once I remember the nightmare, I can write it down and then I use Dictionary of Dreams to interpret it. It always helps me figure out what is going on and deal with it and then like magic the nightmare goes away. 

I don't remember the nightmare, but it did trigger a full fledged plunge off the ledge to what I refer to as menopause brain. They have a pattern, a definite beginning, middle and end. If I can catch them at the beginning I have a chance to stop them and not have a total melt down. Once we get to the middle though, too late, I'm a raving lunatic. By the time Musicman woke up I was in the middle, how pleasant for him to wake up to a raving lunatic for a wife. Not so much.

After the last time this happened and we talked about it I thought he understood what I needed him to do to help me. Yeah, no. He reverted right back to what he used to do many, many years ago when I had PMS issues that were out of control. He leaves me alone, back then that is what I wanted. It was pretty easy to figure out since I would scream at him to NOT TOUCH ME.  I would tell him, leave me alone, his instinct was not to do that. But I couldn't stand to be touched then, it made things worse, so he learned to leave me alone and at all costs not to touch me. 

A change in birth control helped get that issue under control. This menopause brain thing is something relatively new, I've been dealing with it for about a year. I understand his instinct to do what worked last time, only it doesn't work this time. I need his help, he wants to help, but during these times I am not able to tell him in any coherent fashion what will help. It is very frustrating for both of us. 

Once the episode is over I am always physically and mentally exhausted, not the best time to talk.  He tried, he wants to know what will help. I am frustrated because I have told him before and he doesn't seem to remember. Apparently reminding him of it doesn't jog his memory, it just confused him more. 

We did make some small progress, I told him about this little blog. He knew I was writing, he knew I was reading blogs, he has seen me leaving comments on blogs and when he asked what I was doing I told him. I never kept it a secret, I just never came right out and said I was writing a blog. I never worried about it because I knew that if it helped me he would be ok with it. 

He reacted exactly as I anticipated, he asked if it was helping me, I said yes and that was the end of it. He has not asked to see it or to read it. I'm ok with that, but he did ask me to write to him about what will help with the menopause brain episodes. Normally he doesn't like me writing him emails, he prefers me to just talk to him, imagine that. I guess he has realized that if we are going to make any kind of progress with this issue I need to write it down or I can't really get it out in a way that makes much sense.

So I will try again, because as he reminded me, we have been through worse and will get through this. I just don't know yet what I am going to put in the email. I have time to figure it out because he doesn't check his email for months at a time, so once I do finally get it all out and send it I will have to tell him I sent it or he won't find it for months. Not helpful.