Thursday, November 13, 2014

Comfortablly Numb

I know I've been a bit MIA lately, life has just been so hectic. And, to be honest, just a bit easier if I don't take the time to examine it. That's why I haven't written in so long, even though I know writing is a good thing for me. The crux of the issue is that I am really just so much better at taking care of everyone else than I am myself.

The grandbaby is 14 months old now. She is absolutely freakin adorable, yet totally exhausting. Things have changed recently that have necessitated me taking on a more active role in her care. Couple that with the fact that, instead of work lightening up as it usually does this time of year, it is ramping up and life becomes one big ground hog's day.

Musicman is also working more hours at work and side jobs every weekend. He just can't ever say no when people call and ask for help. My phone has been ringing constantly lately. I love that about him, until it becomes so overwhelming that he no longer has time for me. He hasn't had time for me in a couple months now and I haven't had the time, energy or interest in fighting for more.

Sad but true, kink has been all but forgotten and sex, even in the vanilla form, has gone from about every other day to once every 2 weeks. Most days it's all we can do to fall into bed together and hold hands while we drift off to sleep.

It's just part of the natural ebb and flow of life. We've been together 29 years and I've seen and experienced this pattern before. I know it will pass with time. We won't wait too much longer, hopefully, to reclaim each other. We never do.

In the mean time, Mother Nature has dumped a foot of snow on us in a twelve hour period, with more to come. Ugh, other than Christmas Eve, I hate snow. I'm a hothouse flower, caught in the middle of a white out that will last for the next several months. I find the absence of color in my life somewhat depressing.

We are ramping up for the holidays and I'm not sure when I will be able to come up for a breath. I've not given a thought as to when kink may come back into my life. I miss it, but, it's not a huge problem either. I'm really just comfortably numb right now and that's okay, for the moment.

Firefly in Her Element ~ by Martina Avery-Perry