Patience, patience, patience. I have none. I do believe that when God was passing out patience, I held the door for everyone else and by the time I got there he had none left.
Friday night Musicman finally responded to my latest suggestion. It only took a week and a half. Seems like such a simple thing to ask and the waiting was a bit of a challenge for me, but I did it. In his defense, I did not actually explain to him that this was important to me, or why it was.
Not only was I looking for a way to stay connected, both with him and with my sub side, in a house full of people, where spanking(the one sure thing that keeps me connected)is almost nonexistent. I have another reason for proposing this activity.
The pit bull is starting to emerge again. She has good reason. We are currently undergoing testing and Dr. visits for clearances needed for a surgical procedure that Musicman needs to have done.
Musicman has a very complicated medical history. We manage it very well, so most people don't even realize the daily challenges he faces. I believe the fact that I am a natural born caregiver who chose to make that my profession, is one of the reasons the universe put us together. I do an excellent job of coordinating everything and making sure he gets the best possible care available. If he doesn't, they have to answer to the pit bull. Btw, pit bull is the name that Musicman uses to describe me and my actions, when referring to his complicated medical issues.
I'm grateful for the pit bull, she always comes roaring out when we need her. The only problem with that, is that she is so far away from my sub side. When the pit bull comes out, the sub side hides, most likely from fear of getting her head chewed off. Cause that's what pit bulls do, they chomp down and they don't let go.
Knowing that there is a need for her, I wanted to find a way to keep my sub side from going into hiding. It always takes so long for her to come back and I miss her when she is gone. I want to try and prevent the backsliding that occurs when she is around, hence my suggestion.
So, what was my suggestion? Well, we've never been the kind of couple that observes many formal D/s practices. There is nothing we do that, if seen by others, would indicate we are a D/s couple. There is no kneeling, no asking for permission for everyday things, no rules to be followed. Yes, there are some things I seek his permission for and some rules that I follow, but those are things that were setup years ago. They don't feel like D/s to me, they just feel like showing him the respect he deserves, not as a Dom, but as my husband and a human being.
We spend most evenings together, hanging out in our bedroom, relaxing, watching TV and talking about our days. It is a time I thoroughly enjoy. I suggested that maybe on a few of those evenings instead of sitting next to him on the couch, I could sit at his feet. I also asked that during those evenings, if he should choose to indulge me, that he could be a bit more in charge of things. I gave him several ideas of what I meant by that, but, of course, how he chooses to implement it is up to him.
He chose to have me sit at his feet Friday night for the first time. He didn't ask anything of me, but I did give him a nice foot rub. I received a lovely back rub and a very satisfying romp on the couch soon ensued. Afterwards, he did say he had an idea for next time, but he hasn't shared what that is yet. Doesn't really matter to me, I'm ready for more, more, more, whenever he is. Hopefully, it's soon.