Ain't No Knitting Going On Here

I'm trying to learn to knit. It's been quite frustrating, but I think I finally got it. Earlier in the week as I was struggling to make some progress with it, I heard about a survey done by the University of Alabama. The survey said people burn more calories knitting than they do having sex. I don't care, I'll still take sex over knitting any day.

I'm floating on cloud nine today, cause there ain't been any knitting going on here this weekend. Yep, our daughter and her little family went away for the weekend. Hmmm...now...how to get the boy child out of the house for awhile. Musicman to the rescue, he gave the boy money to go out.

Yay, finally, some privacy. We did our best to make the most of it.

The magic paddle was used. It's been awhile, about a month, I think. Wow, did that sting and then thud and then sting again. I even found myself at one point trying to scramble away from his reach. No, I was not successful at that, his hand on my back held me firmly in place.

Mmmmmm....I was already floating into never land when I heard him remark how red I was. Then a switch of implements, the leather strap. Oh yeah, love that leather strap. Love it on my butt, love it on my back, love it on my legs. He covered all those places.

He paused, grabbed my hair and leaned down to my ear, to tell me, very specifically, everything he was going to do to me next. Each thing was accompanied by a just right, tug of my hair. He definitely had my attention, unfortunately, my ability to respond with anything more than one word was lost.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, was all I could say. That wasn't exactly the response he was looking for, so he applied the leather strap some more. Oh, I was most definitely fine with that response. By the time he was done, I was so far beyond any kind of control I would have done or said (had I been able to speak) anything he told me to. I did manage, with some coaxing from him, to say what he wanted to hear.

He was as good as his word and proceeded to do all the things he had previously said he was gonna do. It was wonderful. Every time I thought I couldn't orgasm even one more time, he proved me wrong. I floated from one orgasm to another, sometimes mewling like a kitten, sometimes begging (for what I'm not sure), sometimes screaming, sometimes just gasping for breathe.

His hands grasping like vice grips on my hips, my back arching so far off the bed that I was practically standing on my head. Fists buried in the sheets, gripping tight while I writhed and wriggled in an effort to get closer, or get away. I'm not totally sure which. Doesn't matter either, cause I didn't get away. I got everything I've wanted and needed and then some.

It took me awhile to recover. I was in that glorious, floaty place, unable to feel my body. Just a limp ball of mush with nothing more to worry about than breathing.  I did eventually recover and turned my attentions to him and his beautiful cock, standing at attention waiting for me. I thanked him most profusely.

I slept the sleep of the dead and woke to a lovely hand spanking and some more orgasms. I don't know who the University of Alabama studied for their survey, but I highly doubt their findings. I don't think I could ever burn that many calories knitting, and don't even want to try.



 

His Fault

Just thought I'd start with something inspiring.

 

 

Musicman laughed at me when I told him it was his own fault, but it really was. Ya see, I had asked him how he was feeling. His reply was that his shoulders hurt. He thought that was my fault, but I very respectfully pointed out why it was his fault.

 

It happened last night, we were relaxing, watching some TV and hanging out. He started it, he's the one that murmured the magical words. Those words that have caused butterflies in my tummy for all these many years.

 

"Come here." 

 

He's said these words to me so many times over the years. Sometimes, I don't even get the words, just a finger, gesturing for me to come to him. Other times, he just reaches out and grabs me, pulling me in close. If I have any doubts about his intentions, all I have to do is look in his eyes. His eyes always say the same thing.

 

 "I'm going to consume you.  I will take you to heights you've never known. I will make you soar so high you touch the sun and burst into flame. I will touch your soul and leave my mark upon it. I will show you no mercy, and you will thank me for it."

 

He faced me toward the lounge, then walked away. I realized as I waited, I never look. Many spankings start this way for me. He puts me in position, then retrieves his implements of choice. He's not said I can't look, I just never do. I'm not sure why.

 

He returns and I see implements in my peripheral vision, but I can't tell what. He bends me forward and flips up my skirt. He starts almost immediately. I know from the first blow, he has the leather paddle. I still don't know what else he has brought and I no longer care. I'm lost in the feel of leather connecting with flesh. That moment of sting that explodes into pleasure, the reigning blows cause thought to cease as feelings take over.

 

The stress pours out of me, like air from a pierced balloon. I fly wildly about, too much energy to be contained. Leaning into the paddle as it drives me higher. Seeking, always seeking, that inexplainable place, where our souls collide in a dance that invigorates and nourishes.

 

I hear the words he's saying, burning into my mind. Aiding the ascent to oblivion, my only response, "Yes Sir".  Knowing that the only thing required of me at that moment, is to obey. The confusion of thoughts, lost to the pleasures of pain.

 

I'm on my knees, perched on the edge of the lounge. How did I get here? My body spread wide, open to his perusal, firmly under his control. I can do nothing but react as cool glass firmly invades. I push back, impaling myself upon the rigidness as he continues a running commentary of observations and directions.

 

His words play, like a symphony in my mind, as my body dances to his tune. He orchestrates my pleasure, leading the dance I know so well. Each crest surmounted, not given a moment to recover. He drives me higher, higher, higher. I feel the loss so completely as he withdraws, momentarily.

 

Ahh...there it is, the coolness, pressed against me again, a new place to explore. I experience no hesitation as he invades and begins again. From the back of my mind, it floats forward into my consciousness, I've become the wanton slut he desires. I will take the pain. I will take the pleasure. I will do as he directs, for his amusement.  I will beg for more as he invades and conquers my body as no one has ever done before.

 

When he is satisfied that I've taken all that I can take, he flips me over and begins his assault anew. I'm no longer contained within the confines of my body. His words, his actions, have moved me to another place. A place I seek to be, a place I glory in and beckon him to join.

 

It's so beautiful there, come with me as you drive me higher. We will fly free and experience the epitome of being. The next crest rises before me, my body contorts and is beyond my control. I shatter and don't even realize that screams escape me.

 

See, if he didn't do that to me, I wouldn't have inadvertently hurt him. He tells me, while I was lost within the fog, my body beyond my control, I hurt him. Apparently, I planted my feet firmly on his shoulders, binding myself to him as I flew freely through the ether. It felt great to me, not so much for him. I'd apologize, but I'm not really sorry. I never want to hurt him, but it's not my fault he makes me feel so deeply.

 

 

 

 

faerie flies again

We're home and as much as I didn't want to leave, it is so good to be home.  We stayed in  my brother's room, they have a perfectly lovely double bed, but it ain't our king size water bed. We finally got a decent night's sleep, yay. 

A 10 hour trip turned into 11 hours due to getting stuck in an accident induced traffic jam just five miles into the trip. Not the best of starts, but it was pretty uneventful after we cleared that mess. I usually enjoy the trip, we travel through the Blue Ridge Mountains and the Shenandoah Valley, gorgeous country side. Unfortunately, this time I didn't enjoy the beauty around me, it just reminded me that each mile took me farther from where my heart wanted me to be. That just induced tears on my part.

I did have plenty of time to think while in the car. I realized that this experience is changing some of my limits. Like wiping them away changes. I've always believed in living for today because none of us are promised tomorrow. The mundaneness of day to day life can easily eclipse that kind of thinking though. This just brings that back to the forefront for me.

I thought about some of things that Musicman would like to try that are currently past my limits. I no longer think those limits apply. Now seems like a good time to get past my fears and inhibitions and just try it. What do I really have to loose? Nothing. He has always said if I tried things and didn't like them he wouldn't force me to do it. He's been true to his word too.

I think I was clinging to those limits like they were a security blanket. I realized that they aren't really protecting me from anything. They are inhibiting me from experiencing new things and growing within our relationship. Time to ditch the security blanket, methinks.

All the way home I kept hoping our daughter wouldn't be here so we could reconnect and have some playtime. Oddly, I was almost relieved when I got home and she was here.  That confused me some. Where as just a few moments earlier I had been wanting playtime, I now thought I didn't and was grateful that we didn't have the privacy for it. I realize now I was just so physically, emotionally and mentally exhausted that I didn't know what I wanted.

Musicman, though just as exhausted as I was, did know what he wanted. He knew exactly what he wanted, me. We had only unpacked the stuff from the car that absolutely had to be unpacked, then we showered and I collapsed on the bed. That's when I started having a problem. Musicman wanted to play, but spanking or any other loud activities where off the table because of our daughter being home.

I thought that was okay, I thought that was what I wanted, soft, sweet reconnection.  I had problems getting my head into the game though. I just couldn't focus on anything, erratic thoughts just kept swirling through my mind. Not surprising really, but I usually don't have much of a problem focusing once he lays his hands on me. Not so last night.  Every time he would try and touch me or stroke me or stimulate me in any way, I would push him away and move myself away from him. Very unusual behavior for me.

Thank goodness I did have the presence of mind to tell him that was my issue. He looked at me for a moment, then he slapped me and said I better get my head in the game cause he wanted me. That was all it took, the damn broke, the erratic thoughts were gone. I was instantly in that lovely submissive head space. I immediately stopped pushing him away or trying to get myself away from him.

I was totally focused on him and the moment, the words he'd said running through my head, inflaming me even more. The next time he laid his hands on me, I was ready. Actually, I was more then ready, it didn't take long at all before I was floating off to subspace, my body convulsing in orgasm after orgasm. I alternately buried my face in the pillow or bit down on my own arm to stifle the screams escaping me.

Today, I'm back in my skirts, feeling more like myself and seriously thinking of just telling our daughter she needs to leave for a few hours. At 22, I think she's old enough to understand why we need some private time together and I have no qualms telling her that. Now that the damn's been broken, I'm ready to fly again.

Part 2...or A Talented Man

One of the things I've realized about subspace is, while my own orgasms are absolutely glorious, it's his I crave. I want to taste his cum and wear it on my body, marking me as his. I can cum endlessly, and it's wonderful, but true satisfaction is only achieved when I get his cum.

This makes me ripe for cockworship and I pounce on him with single minded determination. Usually he lets me have my way and his lovely cock receives all of my attention. He surprised me the other night when after just a few minutes of furious facefucking he grabbed my hair and pulled me off him.

It seems he wasn't much in the mood to let me have my way. However, he was in the mood to talk, in fact he had been talking the whole time I had been working away at his cock. Asking me questions, questions designed to remind me exactly who I belong too. Given that my mouth was full my answers were little more then grunts and groans. He wanted more, he wanted to hear me say I am his.

That's what precipitated him pulling me off him. When I didn't answer fast enough or he had to repeat the question it was accompanied by a light, yet effective, slap. It didn't take but a few slaps before I was answering his questions and declaring myself his cocksucking cumslut.

I've not really written much about the slapping, mostly because other than to say I love it I don't have anything to say about it. I especially love it when he slaps me while I'm blowing him. It takes a talented man to slap the face of the woman who has his cock firmly in her mouth. He's a talented man.

I strained towards him, but his hand buried firmly in my hair kept me just far enough away that I could only flick at him with my tongue. I begged, but he wasn't listening to me. When he ordered me to my knees saying he wanted to fuck me, I was actually a bit disappointed but I did as ordered.

The next orgasm hit me as he slid in to the hilt on the first thrust. His words penetrated the haze of lust only sporadically, but when they did they served to drive me higher. Several orgasms later I almost missed it when he ordered me back to his cock, the absence of which in my clenching pussy a sure indication that the agenda had changed again.

I didn't need any orders from him on what to do with his beautiful cock, dripping with my own juices, as he pressed it to my lips. I took him hungrily and this time despite the hand in my hair or the slaps, I didn't stop. I couldn't, I was a woman possessed, a woman who knew what she wanted and wouldn't stop until she got it.

Turns out he didn't really want me to stop, he just wanted to control the timing, which he did very well. As he got closer and closer to blowing his load I increased the pace, but he kept pulling me back, setting the pace where he wanted it. When he was ready and with a sharp yank of my hair he pulled out and shot all over my face and mouth. He was right when he said he knew what I needed.

I fell into the bed sated, sore and one gloriously happy faerie. I was totally spent and ready to drop off to sleep when the next order came. Unfortunately, I have a christmas party to get ready for and don't have the time right now to tell you what that order was, but it was fun.

I'm still having computer issues. I can't post from my own computer, so I write it on mine then use Musicman's to post it. It also won't let me comment most of the time, which is really frustrating me. Musicman said he would look at it tomorrow, so hopefully soon I will be back for real. I miss not being able to comment, to join the conversation and visit with all my kinky friends.

Dropping Through Space

I'm not even sure how to start this post. It's taken me over 48 hours to process everything and figure out exactly what happened. I had thought we were going to have a nice fire Saturday evening, maybe cross the garage off our list of rooms. That's not what happened.

What did happen was subspace. I love that place. I've learned a few things about subspace. I've learned I can't anticipate it or chase it, if I do it doesn't happen. I've learned to relax and just let it envelope me. I've learned the more I achieve it the easier it becomes to achieve it. I achieved it when we played Friday night with the magic paddle. I've learned that most Mondays, after a full weekend of play, sub drop is a definite possibility. I recognize that and have learned what to do to deal with it with some success.

What I didn't know is that at some point subspace can be achieved without pain. I didn't expect that, or the resultant sub drop that occurred almost immediately afterwards. It threw me for a bit of a loop, left me confused and cranky and wondering what the heck was going on.

It all started Saturday night, Musicman did something I didn't really expect, something usually I can't tolerate and squirm away from. Usually when I start to squirm away from him he backs off. This time though, when I started to squirm, he didn't back off. Instead, he clapped a hand on my thigh and firmly held me in place as he increased the intensity.

I was starting to panic, but the minute he clamped his hand on me, was like a brand on my soul. My mind flooded with millions of thoughts in an instant. Thoughts of fighting it, thoughts of I have to get away, I can't handle this intensity.  But, my body instinctually accepted what my mind hadn't conceived of yet. I barrelled right into subspace, and it was intense. More intense then it's ever been before.

For me subspace is a world of juxtapositions. It's cozy and comforting and lazy free wheeling through the clouds. Flying free of my body, all alone in the quietness. It's stark white, almost a total abscence of color. It's crisp and sharp, emotions swirling and bursting in the most vibrant of hues. I'm never alone there, he's always right there with me. Anchoring me, guiding me, pushing me higher and higher. Catching all the pieces as I explode over and over with every peak reached. It's confusing, but for some reason I can't explain, I don't try to understand it, I just accept it and revel in it.

I don't know how long he kept me there that night, but it seemed like forever. It seemed like I was never coming back to earth, or my body. My body, which was totally in his control at that moment, his to do whatever he wanted with. Good thing he reads me so well, cause if he had kept me there much longer I think I would have passed out. The intensity of what he was doing is something I can't remember ever experiencing before.

When he stopped, he curled me up in his arms, rubbing my back, waiting for me to calm some. For my part, I clung to him for dear life, wanting and needing to be closer to him. If I could have figured out how to climb in his skin with him I would have. Since I couldn't I just laid there, on his chest, purring. Yes, I said purring. Musicman thinks it's funny when I do that, make that sound that seems to be a purr. I can't help it, it just kind of happens. Breathing isn't enough, but nothing else is possible, so it comes out sounding like a cat purring.

He continued to hold me and rub my back, talking quietly, soothing me, until the purring subsided. Then it was on to bigger and better for things for him. I needed no coercing to do as he asked, at that point I would have done anything he told me to do without question. Kinda a scary thought that, but I trust him, so I'm not too worried about that.

Both satisfied, he soon fell asleep, and I was well on my way to sleeping too. Then it hit me, I became very anxious and afraid, confusion overwhelmed me. I didn't know what was happening, but I didn't like it. I did eventually fall asleep, but I slept badly and woke in a foul mood. It did occur to me that I was experiencing sub drop, but I wasn't really able to verbalize that. Instead, I snapped at him every time he asked me a question.

I was able to say that I just couldn't answer his questions or make any decisions at that time. Though I couldn't really explain why, it just seemed beyond my abilities at that time. These were not life shattering questions or decisions and should have been quite easy for me, but it wasn't happening. I was very relieved and started to calm when he stepped in and made the decisions.

We had a quiet day in the counrtyside, enjoying the sunshine and the warmth of the dwindling summer. It also featured a nap for me later in the afternoon. That alone is an indication of how out of it I was. Despite the fact that I often sleep poorly, I never nap.

I learned one last thing about subspace and sub drop this weekend. I learned taking me back to subspace effectively rids me of subdrop. He did that by way of the leather paddle Sunday evening.  We played in the living room so another room crossed off the list.